I've photographed over 150 weddings in the past 10 years. And here's what I've noticed: the couples who enjoy their day the most aren't the ones with the biggest budget or the fanciest venue. They're the ones who made a few smart decisions early on and then let go of the rest.

The stressed couples? They're usually trying to control every detail in real time. The relaxed couples? They planned well, delegated everything, and then just showed up and got married.

Here's what the relaxed couples do differently.

1. Hire a Day-Of Coordinator (This Is Non-Negotiable)

I cannot stress this enough. If there's one single investment that will change your wedding day experience, it's a day-of coordinator.

I've seen weddings without one. The bride is answering vendor questions during hair and makeup. The groom is troubleshooting the sound system. Someone's aunt is trying to direct guests to their seats and getting it wrong. It's chaos—and not the fun kind.

A good coordinator handles all of it. Vendor arrivals, timeline management, guest wrangling, the thing that went wrong that you'll never even know about because they fixed it before it reached you.

"But my friend/mom/bridesmaid offered to coordinate."

I love your friend. But your friend hasn't managed 50 vendor relationships, dealt with a caterer who showed up 45 minutes late, or figured out what to do when it starts raining 20 minutes before an outdoor ceremony. A professional coordinator has. They're prepared for every scenario, and that preparation is what lets you actually be present on your day.

According to The Knot's 2025 Real Weddings Study, couples who hire a day-of coordinator report significantly higher satisfaction with their wedding experience. It's worth every penny.

What to budget: Day-of coordinators in Austin typically run $1,500-$3,500, depending on scope. Many Austin venues like Barr Mansion and Ma Maison include coordination in their packages.

2. Keep Family Photos Simple

a warm group portrait of a bride and groom with their closest family members. the lighting is soft and natural, and all people in the photo appear relaxed, comfortable, and stress free.

This is the one that surprises people. You know those giant family photo lists with 27 different groupings? They're a stress bomb.

Here's what happens: After the ceremony, when everyone is riding the emotional high, we spend 45 minutes trying to locate Great Aunt Linda while Uncle Steve wanders off to the bar. The couple gets frustrated. The family gets antsy. The golden hour light disappears.

My recommendation: Stick to the essentials.

Couple + bride's parents
Couple + groom's parents
Couple + both sets of parents
Couple + siblings
Couple + grandparents (if attending)
Couple + full wedding party

That's it. Maybe 8-10 groupings total. We can knock these out in 15-20 minutes, and then you're free.

"But what about all my cousins/extended family?"

Here's the thing: I'm shooting candids throughout the entire reception. I'll capture your cousins laughing, your extended family on the dance floor, your college friends doing something ridiculous. Those natural photos are worth 100 stiff group shots where half the people are blinking.

3. Build Breathing Room Into Your Timeline

The biggest timeline mistake I see? Stacking every single event back-to-back.

Ceremony → cocktail hour → first dance → toasts → dinner → cake cutting → bouquet toss → last dance. No breaks. No buffer. No margin for the 15 minutes you'll inevitably lose somewhere.

What I recommend instead:

Build in 30-minute buffers between major events. This gives you time to:

Actually eat your food (you'd be shocked how many couples don't eat at their own wedding)
Have a quiet moment together away from guests
Mingle and talk to people you haven't seen in years
Deal with anything unexpected without derailing the schedule

One of my favorite things to tell couples: you don't need to be "on" every second. The best receptions feel natural, not like a production. Your guests are happy. They have food, drinks, and each other. Give yourself permission to enjoy the party.

4. Let Go of the Tiny Details

Candid dance floor moment at a wedding reception with guests laughing and celebrating, shoes off, full of genuine energy

In 50 years, when you look back at your wedding, you're not going to remember:

That the napkins were the wrong shade of dusty rose
That your ring bearer tripped walking down the aisle
That the DJ played the wrong song during cocktail hour
That your flowers were slightly different from the Pinterest board

You're going to remember how it felt. The way your partner looked at you during vows. Your dad's face when he saw you for the first time. The dance floor at midnight when everyone's shoes were off and nobody cared about anything except the music.

I've photographed weddings where objectively "everything went wrong"—rain during the outdoor ceremony, a cake that arrived damaged, a groomsman who forgot his pants (true story). And you know what? Those couples still had an incredible day because they rolled with it and focused on what mattered: they were marrying the person they love.

The couples who struggle are the ones who fixate on perfection. Nothing is perfect. Your wedding won't be perfect. And that's completely fine—it'll be real, and real is better.

5. Trust Your Vendors

You hired professionals for a reason. Trust them.

Your photographer (hi, that's me) knows where the good light is. Your florist knows how to make the arrangements work with the venue. Your DJ knows how to read a room and keep people dancing. Your caterer knows when to fire appetizers.

The day of your wedding is not the time to micromanage. It's the time to let the people you chose do what they're good at while you focus on getting married.

Quick story: At a wedding last year, the couple wanted portraits at a part of the venue with gnarly lighting during our portrait window, and instead of forcing the location at that time, I suggested we use the location for a night portrait towards the end of the evening. It gave us more time to optimize beautiful light elsewhere, and gave us a bad-ass night portrait. Flexibility + trust = great results.

The Bottom Line

two grooms stealing a quiet private moment together away from guests, intimate and tender. they sit on a couch reading a book together.

A stress-free wedding day comes down to three things:

Plan well — hire good vendors, build buffer time, keep the family photo list short
Delegate everything — your coordinator, your vendors, your wedding party can handle the day-of logistics
Let go — once the day starts, your only job is to be present and enjoy it

The couples who do these three things? They're the ones who tell me afterward, "That was the best day of our lives." And they mean it—not because everything was perfect, but because they were actually there for it.

Planning your wedding and want a photographer who'll keep things relaxed? Let's talk.

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